Days Before You Came
by 7CrimsonKisses7
Summary: Three-shot. Mello and Matt write letters to each other after Mello has left Matt behind at Wammys.


_The chapters will only be short, as it's hard to get long chapters by writing letters...  
This is set just after Mihael left Wammys...  
If something doesn't make sense, contact me please? ^^_

* * *

Mihael sat at his desk and stared at the sheet of paper in front of him. It was about time he did something, and that something was writing a letter. With a sigh, he began.

_Dear Mail,_

_You hate me now, right? Of course you do, I would hate me too. I would hate me for being so selfish, for being so god damn horrible. That's probably why you hate me now. I want to be free, though. So, I'm sending you this just so that you know. Just so you know that I'm sorry.  
I never wanted to hurt you, but I have, many, many times, and I can't forgive myself for it, even if you can. That's why I've left. One of the reasons I left, anyway. It's the reason I didn't take you with me, in any case. If I'm away from you, then I can no longer hurt you. Mail, this is the last time that you will feel this way because of me. I will be doing things that could kill me, and I didn't want you to be dragged into this mess. If anyone found out that we were friends, then you could be dragged into this as well. So that's why I will only contact you this once, just to tell you how I feel. Just so that I can say all the things that I didn't get a chance to say before I left you._

_You are the only real friend I had, and that is why I was probably so terrible at being a friend to you. I know it is no excuse, but if it helps, I know I screwed up now. Maybe I will learn to be better at that, and if we ever get a chance to meet again then I can impress you with my friend skills. It's something to work on, at least. I could never be as good a friend as you have been to me, but I can always dream, right? Well, I guess that we'd stay friends despite this if I hadn't been such a dick about it. Then maybe you'd forgive me. Oh well, what's done is done. One day, maybe I won't be a dick, and you'll forgive me. Or maybe I'm just dreaming._

_I just want you to understand something, Mail. I didn't want to leave. I really didn't... But, if you think about it, I wouldn't be able to catch Kira strolling around Wammys... If I didn't do something quickly, Near would beat me. You know me, Mail; I will do anything I have to to beat that motherfucker. I mean, it would be nice to take that option you suggested to me once, and run away from everything together, leaving the lives we know and starting new ones, but I can't run away from my duties. I'm not a pussy. I miss you. I probably will miss you until I catch Kira. When that happens, I will seek you out, and we can be together again. If you've forgiven me by then, that is... My hope is that one day you will join me. We can beat Near together then. But that can only happen when I know you're safe. I hope that you do realise that I'm doing this to keep you from harm. You matter to me, Mail._

_One more thing before I leave you be. Just so that I can live a little more content, knowing I have told you this. I love you, Mail. I have for years. I know, I should've told you before I left, but I was scared that you'd love me too, and then it would be harder for me to leave. I love you more than anything, and that's why I can't wait until all this is over, and we can see each other again. Yes, I know I'm presuming here, but that's what I do best. I presume things. I guess I shouldn't plan too far ahead though, because I may die during my pursuit of Kira. So, Mail, I want you, but I can't have you until I am finished. So, please wait for me?_

_Love Mihael._

Mihael shook his wrist, trying to get rid of the cramp forming. Now all that was left was to post the letter. He just hoped that Mail would reply.

* * *

_There we are. I hope it wasn't too terible, I found it quite challenging.  
I should get the next chapter up soonish, but after this, Expectancy is my priority._


End file.
